Author Archives: Guest Poster

The Climate Inquisition vs. The Heresy of Science

     The following was obtained as a note attacked to a comfy chair that was recently delivered… NOBODY expects the Climate Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise…surprise and fear…fear and surprise…. Our two weapons are fear and surprise…and ruthless efficiency…. Our … Continue reading

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Modern Day Reanimator

     The following was delivered via non-Euclidean post from Miskatonic University… I am ecstatic that scientists today are finally engaging in accurate research concerning bringing the dead back from life. I am, of course, speaking of Project Reanima: “Scientists are getting … Continue reading

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Luna Declares War on Brianna Wu

     This message was received from independence leader Adam Selene of the Luna colony via the colony’s HOLMES IV system. It would seem you do not take our commitment to independence seriously, what with purported Earth politician Brianna Wu, who stands … Continue reading

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A Word of Warning for Pineapple Hating Presidents Everywhere

     The following message from Cuthbert Aloysius Coddington III, President of the Amalgamated International Fruit Company, delivered via telegram as delivered by a young boy who looked like that one girl from “The Go-Go’s”… It has come to our attention that … Continue reading

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Time Crystals

     The following message was delivered via hypercube from a scientist by the name of “John Smith” working at the United Nations Intelligence Taskforce… Some of you have heard reports of a “time crystal” which silly Earth scientists have dared to … Continue reading

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Kindergarteners LOVE Pazuzu!

     The following post was jotted down while listening to the dying words of a Catholic priest by the name of Father Damien… Hey kids! It’s your old pal, Captain Howdy! I’m ever so glad that a kindergarten teacher in a … Continue reading

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Mother Nature is a Cis-Normative H8r

     The following was obtained after a college gender justice retreat was “recycled” by rapid cis-gendered squirrels with the left-over guts inspected by a cis-gendered haruspex. I make boys boys, and girls girls. Even most silly humans know that! though there … Continue reading

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Dissolving the Last Remnants of the Old Republic

     The following was from one of the 873,035 voices crying out in terror and suddenly silenced following a terrorist attack by “rebels”… Our beloved Emperor has wisely abolished the chaotic nature of “local control” in order to establish peace and … Continue reading

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Feminists, Have a Cigar

     Blithely talking about “depopulating” and then “repopulating” whilst replacing the underlying ideologies may seem what an academic claims is the view of some eeevil White colonialist, but in fact it the rallying cry of Feminist Professor Jane M. Ussher’s paper … Continue reading

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The Presumed Crime of Not Money Laundering

     They following is a justifiably concerned critique of the way anti-money laundering laws are structured to presume guilt, with all the punishment that that deserves, from Henry Stern from InsureBlog. As a licensed life insurance agent, I have to take … Continue reading

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